Monday, July 04, 2011

Dear Granny and Grandpa

Tremendous news. I am a million times better and I haven’t been sick anywhere for ages. I even caught a duck on Sunday. Norty Maffi - he was so excited at how brilliant I was at catching the duck that he decided he would help. I had just caught it by the neck when Maffi threw himself at me and we ended up in a big ball on the floor; Maffi on me, and me on the duck. It was quite a fright actually and unfortunately the duck escaped between Maffi’s legs. He seemed to think it was my fault and was telling me off really quite sternly but I gave him a hard stare and made sure he was quite aware it was MY DUCK and he RUINED IT ALL.

Ducks are easier to catch than sausages.

Last Sunday Mum took me to the boat show. I went last year and had an ice cream because it was “so hot”. Then I had to sit under the tap because it was “too hot” (hateful don’t try it). Then I had a sleep on Chertsey while Mum got hot somewhere else. 

This time it started off not hot. I knew things were going to be great because as soon as we arrived Sarah (from Chertsey) suggested we all had breakfast together. I sat next to a huge breakfast sandwich whose owner, Mr American, was delighted to see me.  He was not quite delighted enough to give me his sandwich though – how he resisted my big brown eyes and floppy ears for so long is beyond me. I even breathed in so my ribs stuck out even more.  I ran through my manners; I lay down, I looked disinterested, I sat, I pretended to be asleep but I had to watch him eat ALL THE BREAKFAST really slowly; one bite at a time chewed a hundred times.

Oh Granny it was awful

I had a miserable time.

He didn’t understand sharing AT ALL. Or so I thought.  Right at the very end he gave me a HUGE sausage.  I was so surprised I nearly fainted.  No sooner had I started chomping at it than Mum took it off me and stole half of it for herself which was very annoying (what is it about Humans – if it isn’t ducks it is sausages).  Actually, it was O.K.because she didn’t eat it herself she gave it to Scrumpy – I had forgotten he likes sausage. 

I like Scrumpy; he is a bit wiser and a bit older than me. I used to think he was really hairy, but he isn’t. He just likes to wear his bed so he can lie down comfortably at all times. Very sensible indeed.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Eli Bastin said...

Who is Scrumpy? I am most intrigued!

5:17 PM  
Blogger Maffi said...

At a guess Scrumpy is a dog.

10:25 PM  
Blogger MortimerBones said...

Scrumpy is a dog. He is a long dog with the shaggiest baggiest longest furiest hair in the world. He is big and wise.

10:27 AM  
Anonymous Caroline said...

So glad to hear you're feeling better Boots! The loss of the duck was probably as well given that you'd been poorly - you never know where they've been!

9:32 PM  

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