Was it such a good idea?
The cleaning ladies (and Nathan) are fantastic fun, and have always listened to my stories, trials and tribulations with a fine balance of sound advice and falling around laughing. They know when to laugh, and they know when to 'cry'. They are fabulous. Indeed, many of my friends are brilliant, good job really, because I need them to be!
Anyway, after months of preparations after deciding to get a fish to accompany me on the boat; the endless discussions with various aquatic experts in my department, not to mention the excitement of progressing through the various stages of setting up the tank AND making sure I really DO want a fish and will look after it properly. I took the plunge and went to purchase the fish. You must understand it took me MONTHS and MONTHS to get to the stage of going to the fish shop. When they turned me away as an 'unsuitable owner' you will understand my distress.
Not only is it highly embaressing to fail after all the research and time I put in to ensure the fish would be happy; it is extremely disappointing. I tried to share my pain with the first friends I saw, and they rolled around laughing. Taking the hint I decided I would keep the whole fish thing quiet and stop talking about it. To be honest, I think everyone was relieved. I was marginally hurt but I was hardly going to say anything was I.
However, I still felt the pain, so I decided I would write about it in my column for canalboat magazine. It seemed the best way of telling people without having to do it face to face. So, when the magazine came out, I did the usual thing and took it down to the cleaning ladies (and Nathan) to read. I have NOT heard the end of it.
Oh well, it is good to see people rolling around in hysterics at my misfortune. I have told them my aquariam looks fantastic and the aquatic plants are thriving, very interesting and a complete delight to have on the boat, but that just makes them laugh even more.
Hmm... I wonder if it was such a good idea owning up to the fact that I am considered to be an unsuitable owner? Perhaps I should have gone to a different fish shop and saught a second opinion... hmmm...
Anyway, after months of preparations after deciding to get a fish to accompany me on the boat; the endless discussions with various aquatic experts in my department, not to mention the excitement of progressing through the various stages of setting up the tank AND making sure I really DO want a fish and will look after it properly. I took the plunge and went to purchase the fish. You must understand it took me MONTHS and MONTHS to get to the stage of going to the fish shop. When they turned me away as an 'unsuitable owner' you will understand my distress.
Not only is it highly embaressing to fail after all the research and time I put in to ensure the fish would be happy; it is extremely disappointing. I tried to share my pain with the first friends I saw, and they rolled around laughing. Taking the hint I decided I would keep the whole fish thing quiet and stop talking about it. To be honest, I think everyone was relieved. I was marginally hurt but I was hardly going to say anything was I.
However, I still felt the pain, so I decided I would write about it in my column for canalboat magazine. It seemed the best way of telling people without having to do it face to face. So, when the magazine came out, I did the usual thing and took it down to the cleaning ladies (and Nathan) to read. I have NOT heard the end of it.
Oh well, it is good to see people rolling around in hysterics at my misfortune. I have told them my aquariam looks fantastic and the aquatic plants are thriving, very interesting and a complete delight to have on the boat, but that just makes them laugh even more.
Hmm... I wonder if it was such a good idea owning up to the fact that I am considered to be an unsuitable owner? Perhaps I should have gone to a different fish shop and saught a second opinion... hmmm...
posted by MortimerBones at
9:08 PM
11 Comments:
Being of lesser education and not, to my great shame, a regular reader of your magazine columns, please don't keep me in suspense. In what way are you considered an unsuitable custodian of the carp, friend of fish (domestic)? How would the purveyor of the piranahs know that you were in any way unsuitable? Have you been weighed in the scales of fishcare (Level 1) and found wanting? Does one have to fill out some dreadful proforma? Is there a formal examination process ? Care of a carp --- Discuss. (2000 words) How does one become a guardian of goldfsh? Do you get home visits from piscean protectors to assess your fish care capabilities. Do they think you paid good money for your new companions only to releaese them into the wild where they would not be equipped to fend for themselves?? FREE WILLY ! ! (No Miss T not like that.) Are risk assessments required ?
This is Health & Safety gone mad. Absolutely outrageous!!!!!
The fair will be in town soon. I'm sure even you can win a fish in a bag ;-)
I think they have been known to give them away if your persistant enough, which we all know you are ;-)
I won a fish at the fair once. Unfortunately the day before we were packing up and leaving Newcastle uni. Put fish back in bag it came in and duly carried it in my lap in the white van borrowed by friends. Every so often the fish looked distressed so I hung it out the window with the open end windwards to re oxygenate the water. Seemed to work well as fish kept reviving. Finally got it to london and whilst unpacking said van only 'container' I had quickly to hand was a shallow china fruit bowl. Everytime I got back to the flat with another load the fish was flapping on the table having leapt out of bowl. I finally located a see through bowl. (I knew fishy couldn't see what was going on hence the kamikase stuff). The bowl was the one from the moulinex. I did remove the blades first. Fish lived for at least a year after that if not more. If I can manage to look after a fish in those circumstances surely you are perfectly capable ...
But then I don't know you ...
Kath
PS I am so excited I have swopped build slots so my baseplate goes down in about three weeks. Woo hoo I don't have to wait until December.
It is plain from your commitment so far that you would be a perfect piscatorial parent, and are even better placed than most to give your charge a good understanding of its cultural heritage etc. (i.e. water) Is it because you're not gold? Too middle class? Too... how shall I put it... human? Having exhausted the official route, perhaps you will have to consider looking abroad, or approach a less reputable source (maybe a garden centre?) who will not make such rigorous demands of your suitability.
Was it one of those shops that won't sell to anyone? I've been to a few second-hand bookshops, where you have to prise the merchandise from a palsied claw.
ISSUE ! ! !
Second hand books do not survive in an aquarium envrironent.
Possible reason for palsied claw (not an elegant expression but I know what you mean). Trust me I used to be an electrician.
AND Dr Bones you stil have not given us the reason why you were denied this simple earthly pleasure. Please enlighten those of us that seek knowledge at your doorstep.
or should that be gangplank ???
When she was about 10, our daughter went to a fair with a friend and brought home a fish in a bag. We installed it in a tank and it looked very happy. Her brother said, "It's not fair, I want a fish". I thought, well if you've got one, you might as well have two and the fish might appreciate the company. The next day we stopped off at a garden centre on the way home from school and he chose a fish. When we arrived home, we discovered the first fish had died. "It's not fair", she wailed, "I want a fish". Well, I thought, if you've got one, you might as well have two! Back we went to the garden centre. They lived happily and healthily in a tank without a filter for about two years.
See, we all have a fishy tail to tell. C'mon Mort don't be shy, we won't tell any one. Why are you not considered a suitable guardian for Barry. You didn't mention your other hobbies did you ?
KH, Barry was the name for the diver... I never did find a diver.
The goldfish is now considered to require a proper filtration system and taking out buckets of water and replacing them, and all that jazz is not considered to be a proper filtration system. If the fish tank and fish dont have it, the owner is regarded as cruel and unsuitable. The shop refused to sell me one. I do have some aquatic plants though, so all is not lost. I was thinking about going to the rescue centre for a fish, but apparently you have to have 'house' interviews, and my boat lavatory might not be up to scratch.
One can no longer get them at faires I am told.
You'll have to go to Yorkshire...my in-laws sent off to the fair with my niece.
The last thing my s-i-law said to them was "don't come back with a fish..."
Goldy aka Stinky came back home with them. My m-i-law now has to go over to clean out the tank, stock with plants etc..."you got it, you take care of it".
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